It's time for some Dear......letters

Dear Milkman,

I am very sorry that I have had to cancel my milk deliveries with you today. 
Yes, I do appreciate that it is a difficult time for dairy farmers at the moment.
But, delivering milk after 8.30 in the morning is no help to anybody...especially those who have to go out to work resulting in it being left outside all day. When I signed up for home delivery you said that it would be at the same price as the supermarkets i.e. £1.50 for the large plastic carton....but you omitted to tell me that your large carton is in fact only 2 litres whereas the supermarkets are 2.2 litres. Maybe if your lazy milkman got out of his pit a bit earlier then I would not have to go back to getting my milk from Mr T or Mr S?

Trust me, I am not a nice person to be around first thing without a cup of tea inside of me.

Thank you

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Dearest Husband,

I am sorry that you feel that the service at home is deteriorating.  Last night whilst in bed you decided that you wanted to have cornflakes for supper.  So downstairs you went only to return in a few minutes later with a peanut butter sarnie in hand to say that you were really pissed off.  Apparently there were not any cornflakes left and you didn't fancy rice crispies.  As you know, I very rarely eat cereal so I wouldn't have been aware that we had run out.  However, if you had put the empty box beside the bin that may just have alerted me to the situation...but no, as with the orange juice, milk, ketchup, jam, bubble bath, shaving foam, toothpaste and countless other items YOU decided to leave an empty box on the shelf....perhaps you have learnt your lesson now.

Your loving wife x

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Dear Daughters High School,

Thank you very much for the weekly newsletter. By chance I happened to notice on the back page bottom right hand corner, in very small print, a paragraph to say that the back entrance to my daughter's school would be closed as from Monday. I appreciate your reasons for doing this is for site security and therefore the safety of the children. However, did no one stop to think about the implications of doing this? The main entrance to the school is on a busy road, which is a bus route with no parking. At present there are 1500 pupils in the school which will rise to 1800 in September.

It was absolutely bloody bedlam on Monday morning. It is a wonder that no one got hurt.....by this I mean my daughter. She was in a complete frenzy as she actually thought she was going to marked late (something that has never happened to her before) because I got sandwiched between 2 buses as the traffic was not going anywhere. My stress levels where sky high. Luckily, I watched the professionals in the 70's and got her in..... just in the nick of time.

I sense that only a few parents spotted the 'snipit' on the back page (or couldn't be arsed to read it) as children were trying to kick the back gate open or climb over it.

Next time you have something really important to tell us, it might be a good idea to put it on the front page...IN BIG BOLD LETTERS, just a thought.

A Disgruntled Parent